Halloween and I’m writing this by candlelight. Finally got a candle holder. My deodorant ran out and lucky, Old Spice Red Zone happens to fit two white standard candles just fine. I have been in country for a month now and have accumulated ¼ of a Target plastic bag in garbage. In the states, I’d have taken the trash out at least two times, filling one of those green bins each time. Here, there is no trash collector hence no dump other than the streets. Things are dirty but also pretty clean. Since everyone prays five times to the east and have to wash their hands and faces each time it keeps them clean and dust free. Plus they bathe twice a day and always wash their hands. Things aren’t clean here by U.S. standard, dishes and clothes are best left to be done out of sight, out of mind.
But still we went on a 4 day excursion to Janjanbureh (or Georgetown) and stayed at a rustic camp, not unlike Tendeba only without electricity. But there was running water and the shower was a much welcome luxury. This camp was on the river so mosquitoes were the # 1 pest. I have a system now, however. I shower (or bucket bathe) then I hop into scrubs, t-shirt and socks (most important since the little shits go after the feet most of all). I just plain out don’t wear shorts or sandals at night if I can help it. Or at least sandals with socks which is my #1 fashion pet peeve but since my scrub pants drape over the ankles, and since it serves a purpose, it suffices my hypocracy for now at least. So the mosquitoes (or bodi) weren’t such a problem this time. The monkeys however were.
I was sharing a room with “A” and “K” (who we’ve named “stripes” because we have like three “K”) and one day this “K” wore a striped shirt and the name stuck. I will continue to make it stick!! So late at night, nothing stirring in and then along comes this sound of a man shouting and more sounds of animals scampering around. I’m dreaming fast asleep because its like four in the morning and what else would I be doing. And upon hearing these noises I instantly dream that there is a man outside our room herding sheep at 4a.m. through the camp. What wakes me up is the sound of some type of mammal crashing upon the aluminum roof over our heads. I jolt up still in the “sheep herding dream” thinking now, half awake that a goat has busted down our door and has proceeded to eat, in and around Stripes. I call out “Stripes, you okay?” Obviously she is, because a goat didn’t come busting through our door. Rather some type of monkey or monster, had crash landed on our tin roof, which is already loud and from what we could make out, took the next half hour to eat, or perhaps mate with another monkey or perhaps monster. We’re not really sure. Although there were plenty of monkeys at camp and possibly no monsters, the sounds that came from above us on the roof were not only inhuman but I don’t think even primates have the gurgling capacity or want to make those kinds of noises no matter how badly it wants to eat or mate or how badly it does not want to be eated or mated upon. Like most other interferences and strange noises in the night outside my window, I began to pay it no mind and fell quickly asleep again still wondering if there was a chance that a goat might still come into our room and eat Stripes.
This morning was the first time I actually made it to breakfast at the camp. I wouldn’t say on time, because I wasn’t, but at least I made it while they were still serving. I was able to finally eat the buffet of bread, butter flavored Crisco, strawberry jam (a rare treat!) and little bean curd donuts not unlike Malasadas or whatever its called. They had two forks wrapped in napkins instead of one fork, one knife. But lucky they did because my first fork fell on the ground not because I’m clumsy though often I am, but you see, one of these monkeys the cute skinny gray kind with long tails and almost baboon faces, the kind that infest the trees around the eating area and forage for leftover scraps, the kind that probably has e-bola. One decided to be daring and come over and sit by me. For a split second I was like, “holy shit, there’s a monkey that just came right up to me how awesome!” Until halfway through my thought I noticed that the monkey was only looking at my plate and before I knew it, the damn thing snatched a piece of bread off my plate knocking my fork to the ground. Before I could call the cops or say “hey, stop that” the monkey was back in the tree enjoying my fresh piece of bread. Bastard. I have now rightfully been mugged twice in my life. Once at gunpoint in L.A., and the other in Africa by a monkey. Sometimes I wonder what good it was that we evolved in the first place. Damn monkey.
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